Lily, One Lord's Temptation (The Garden Brides #1) Page 19
With a sigh, Max rose from his seat and tugged on the bell pull, his valet arrived in a matter of moments.
“Yes, Lord Maxwell.”
“Please retrieve my ledgers.”
“Very good.” He bowed and exited the room. Max turned and grinned at Lily as he took his seat.
“Dear, please eat more, or I shall be forced to feed you myself.”
Her eyes widened, but Lily did do more than pick at her food.
“Why did you need your ledgers?” she asked hesitantly.
“You shall see.”
After a few moments his valet returned.
“Please place them on the bed.”
The valet did as requested. “Is there anything else?”
“I believe I have all I need for the evening.” Max wasn’t looking at the ledgers but at his wife.
Her cheeks blossomed into a lovely shade of red. Oh, if only he were feeling stronger, he would make her his wife in truth.
Max leaned back and sipped his wine, waiting for Lily to eat enough to satisfy him.
“I can’t eat another bite,” she complained.
It wasn’t as much as he would have liked, but it was more than she usually ate so Max let her be. After he stood, he offered his hand and escorted her to the bed where he lifted the ledgers and opened to the most current figures.
Lily glanced at them, then back at her husband. “What is this?”
“Our finances.”
Her face turned white and her eyes grew large. “This is how much you owe?”
Max chuckled. “No, my dear, this is how much we are worth.”
Lily sank to the bed, then traced the figures with her fingers.
“Lily.”
She turned to look at him. He took her hands in his.
“I have never needed an heiress. I own this house, I own the land, every horse in the stable, everything you see around you. And as you can see, we will want for nothing. My investments increase almost daily, but I am not foolish in where I spend the funds.”
“But I thought. . .”
“Shh.” He placed his fingers against her lips. “I never needed an heiress.”
“I assumed. . .”
“Yes, I know. It is what everyone assumed. My only regret is that I didn’t tell you my worth before. I only claimed to not care about your dowry without explanation.” He squeezed her fingers. “I wanted you to trust in my love for you. It is you I wanted to be married to and not what your father could offer. I needed you to believe that, but I have only brought you pain for not being honest.”
Her brows knit together, as if she were trying to absorb what he had just said. “It was me?”
Max smiled down at this wife. “Lily, it has always been you. I believe I lost my heart to you the moment you attempted to ignore me at Almack’s. I have fallen deeper in love with you each day. Nobody has ever come close to making me feel the way you do. Nor has anyone ever frightened me as much as when you disappeared for so long. I feared I had lost you forever when your father delivered your letters to me.” He looked into her eyes. “You do know I never received them?”
She nodded her head.
“Had I, I would have tracked you down and run away with you. All you had to do was ask.”
Fresh tears sprang to her eyes.
“Lily, my love for you is unconditional and will always remain so. Do you now trust in what I am saying?”
“It was me?”
It was if she couldn’t believe what he was saying. Perhaps she couldn’t. Max had only experienced the unpleasantness of her father a few times, and each time the gentleman found a way to degrade his own daughter. If Lily had to listen to that her entire life, no wonder she’d never believe that someone wanted her for herself.
The courtship and how she fought him at the beginning came back to him. Of course she assumed all those gentlemen were after the prizes Artemisia offered, but she would never believe that the grandest prize of all was her.
“Lily, you are my heart and that is never going to change.”
A tear spilled down the side of her cheek. It would take time, but if Max did nothing else, he would make sure Lily realized she was loved and adored and was worth far more than any riches a man could own.
Chapter 41
A snore emanated from Max as he slumbered, which Lily found endearing. He looked so boyish, without a care as he slept. Something pulled at her heart.
He had never needed her dowry and never wanted anything else her father had offered. Max simply wanted her.
Lily wasn’t sure what to make of it. His words tonight had nearly been her undoing. She wanted to believe him. So desperately she wanted to trust in his love and the future, but it scared her. This was all too good to be true and Lily feared that if she fell asleep, she’d wake in her lonely cottage, alone, having dreamt it all.
She gave a laugh filled with irony. All the time she was hiding, she was practically on his property. Had she known during those unsure months, would she have made her way to his door? She would have certainly been tempted and didn’t doubt that during one of her weaker moments she would have sought out Max.
Originally, she had planned to travel farther. However, the fear of being away from Wesley and her cousins kept her rooted in England. She also wasn’t brave enough to strike out for foreign shores. It was why she had chosen the cottage in the first place. The place was almost in complete seclusion. Though she knew her discovery by servants had been inevitable, she had counted on their silence. For a few short months, she had lived peacefully in her own world, though lonely and unsure at times. It would have been during those hours she would have been the most tempted to go to Max.
Regardless of what she may have done, she was now in Maxwell’s home and they were married.
Max stirred and opened his eyes. His smile warmed her heart and it constricted painfully.
“I remember very little, but I have a vague memory of you praying.” His eyes softened as he spoke in a more serious tone.
Lily sat in the chair she had inhabited for weeks now. “Yes. When I had done all I could and the doctor was at a loss, I prayed. You would have done the same, probably much sooner than I, and I was determined to try anything.”
“Are you saying you now believe in something you cannot see?”
“I don’t know.” She shrugged. “My mind has difficulty accepting the possibility because it is not logical. Yet, since I prayed for you, and continued to pray for you, I feel calmer.” She sighed. “I don’t know how to explain this. It could be exhaustion and my emotions are too numb to worry.”
“Do you really believe that?” Max asked in earnest.
Lily met his eyes. “I honestly don’t know. It is so hard to accept. However, I will admit to believing in the possibility instead of dismissing it out of hand as I have before.”
“I guess I will accept that, for now.” Max offered. “And that calmer feeling you experienced is called peace.” He reached out and took her hand. “You’ve probably never experienced it before, so I understand if you don’t recognize it now.”
“Peace?”
“Yes.” He smiled. “Think on it. Embrace it. Become used to it as that is your life from known on.”
The idea of faith in something intangible was hard to come to grips with. Yet, peace was exactly what she experienced. Max was right, it wasn’t a sensation she was accustomed to. She had been waiting for something huge, well not exactly locusts, but a major event. Was the sign as simple as the calming warmth she had been recently experiencing?
It was too much to think on. It shook her foundation and she abruptly stood. “I need to mix more herbs. Can I bring you anything when I return?”
Max smiled as if he knew what she was thinking, but that was impossible. Thankfully he did not question her further. “I would like some books from the library. My mind will turn to mush if I lay here doing nothing much longer.”
Lily tried to put all thoughts of God from her mind
as she mixed the horehound and colt’s foot. Max’s cough was diminishing and she knew that soon he would not need the concoction for a restful sleep. When she finished, she went to the library and was stunned at the number and array of books shelved on the four walls. Her father had a similar library at home, but she was allowed to read only those that benefited her education as a perfect lady and future wife.
She wandered and read as her fingers traced titles. She had always wanted to read a book for pleasure and as she had more time with Max on the mend perhaps she would read a few herself. How long had she wished to read fiction? Simple, frivolous fiction.
“Are you looking for something specific?”
Lily made an abrupt turn. She was so lost in her own thoughts she had not heard Max’s mother enter the room.
“Max asked for something to read. I am afraid I am not sure what he would prefer.”
Her Grace studied the shelves. “He has probably read everything.” She turned and walked to a small table in front of the fire. “Since he learned to read, Max always had a book in his possession. He would devour one after the other. Fiction, historical, scientific manuals, whatever he could get his hands on.”
Lily did not know this about her husband. It also gave her hope that he would not prohibit her from indulging in the same activity.
“I brought some books with me to read during my trip. They are more recent publications and Max probably has not read them.”
Lily took the books. “Thank you. I will take these to him.”
He was leaning against his pillows, staring out the window when Lily returned. “Your mother was kind enough to give these to me. She said you probably had not read them.”
He turned to look at her. “Thank you.”
“I didn’t know you were such an avid reader.”
“Ah, Mother has been talking about me again.”
“Only that bit of information. Are there other things I should know about you, Max?” she teased as she sat on the end of the bed.
What came over her? She hadn’t teased Max since the week at her aunt’s home.
“I am happy to tell you anything you would like to know.” He grinned up at her.
She thought she knew him, but she didn’t. And, Lily didn’t even know where to begin or what questions to ask. Besides, if she asked him questions, he might want to know more about her and she was already feeling vulnerable. “When I think of something I will ask.” She placed the books in his lap. “These should keep your mind occupied for a short time.”
Max picked them up and began reading titles. “Le Cuisinier Royal, a cookbook?” Max questioned as he looked up at Lily.
She shrugged her shoulders, having not looked at them before now.
“The Knitting Teacher? My mother must have been desperate for reading material.” He placed it on the bed next to him with the cookbook and picked up the next.
“Wat Tyler by Robert Southey. No, I don’t think so.” He reached to pick up the next.
“A book of poetry by Keats. Not in the mood.” He picked up the last and read. “Northanger Abbey. Well, my mother’s tastes are certainly eclectic.”
None of them sounded interesting to Lily either, except Northanger Abbey. Daniella had spoken of the author as being one of her favorites. If Max did not want to read that one, maybe she would.
“Perhaps I can locate a favorite novel that you wouldn’t mind reading again, and I can bring it to you.”
Her eyes wandered to Northanger Abbey. She longed to read the novel. Not only in defiance of her father’s rules, but to experience what her cousin described as an escape into another’s world.
Max placed his hand over the book. “I think I will read this one.”
She looked up. He was studying her. Did he suspect she wanted the book for herself?
“Let me know how you like it.” She stood. “Ring if you need anything.”
In truth, this was not his choice of reading material, despite the reviews this author had received. He suspected the works were enjoyed more by the female population. However, Lily looked at it with such longing that he could not help himself. He had been trying to find a way to make her spend more time with him. At the moment, he was limited to where and how he could track her down and searched for a purpose to keep her at his side. This novel was his answer.
Lily had never read a novel. Her father had announced that to Max’s parents when they first visited. When he sent her for a book he had hoped she’d choose something that sounded interesting to her, but she retrieved books for himself, only. And, they were ones his mother had brought with her.
“How is the novel?” She asked when she stopped in his room after dinner.
“I haven’t started it yet.”
“Why?”
“I thought to peruse the recipes first.”
“You already employ the best cook in England,” she reminded him.
“I thought you could join me,” Max offered.
“Join you in reading a book?” She frowned. “I always understood that to be a solitary activity.”
“Not if one is reading to the other.” He winked at her. Max needed to find a way to keep him at his side, and not as a nurse, but as his wife.
“You propose to read to me?” she questioned as she settled on the side of the bed.
“Well, I thought I would read the first chapter, then you can read the second to me and so on.”
Lily stared at him. Had no one ever read to her before, not even as a child? After a moment she set her shoulders and straightened. “Very well.”
Max chuckled. “This is not a schoolroom, Lily. Relax. Sit next to me.” He patted the opposite, open side of the bed.” They’d been married a few weeks and she hadn’t even been in his bed. Of course, he had been sick, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t begin to share intimacies, such as reading a book together.
Lily glanced to where he indicated. Pillows were stacked against the headboard in a most inviting manner.
“Please. I am tired of laying here in seclusion.”
Lily took a deep breath and walked to the opposite side of the bed and climbed up before she settled back against the pillows. “You are too far way,” Max insisted as he scooted near her. Lily didn’t move a muscle. “Ready?” he asked as he opened the book.
Lily didn’t move while he read. When he reached chapter two, it was her turn to read and Lily had no choice but to move closer to him so that she’d be closer to the light. Max listened to her low, rich voice and enjoyed having her beside him.
Too soon, she reached the end of the chapter and handed the book back to him. Max was afraid she’d move away again, instead, she scooted further down the bed, lay on her side and rested her head on a pillow. Max put an arm around her and pulled her close until Lily rested her head on his chest.
It was a beginning and he couldn’t be more content. Before he completed the chapter, Lily was sound asleep, her relaxed body curled against his. Max closed the book and turned down the lamp, content to hold her, and closed his eyes.
Max couldn’t have been asleep long before pounding at his door woke him with a start. Lily stirred and sat up and Max called the servant to enter.
Wilson, Max’s butler, stepped into the room. “We have a most insistent guest.”
Drake burst into the room. Max hadn’t expected to see him for some time. He had only left a little over a week ago to return to the city. He could have only been in London a day, if that, before he must have made the return trip to the estate.
“I’ve come to warn you,” Drake announced.
Chapter 42
Panic surged as Lily scrambled off the bed. Her father had found her! Did he know she had married? How soon would he be here? Max wasn’t healthy enough for a confrontation with her father. At least His Grace and Max’s older brother were here, and a houseful of servants. Still, her father could be a formidable man.
Her jaw clenched and tension tightened in her shoulders. For years, th
is had been her normal state. Until now, she had not realized how relaxed she had become since running away. Her father would not take her away from here and if it seemed like a possibility, she would run again. This time much farther away. She would never go back with that man.
“I even threatened, Max. You know that is unlike me.”
“You still haven’t explained,” Max prompted as he turned and put his feet on the floor.
“Frankly, the battle was over before it began,” Drake sighed as he fell back into a chair.
“What battle?” Max asked with frustration.
“How soon?” Lily asked. She needed to know how much time she had before she faced her father again.
Drake shrugged. “I know you don’t need this now, Max, but I really was left with little choice.”
“Lord Max, where are you?” a voice called from down the hall.
“Is that a child I hear?” Lily asked as she walked toward the door.
More voices called for Lord Max and Lily opened the door.
A little boy of no more than seven stood in the door. His eyes lit as soon as he spied Max on the bed. He then turned and yelled, “He’s here. He’s here.”
“Peter, where did you come from?” Max smiled at the boy.
“We heard you were sick and came to see you.”
Max chuckled and pulled the child up onto the bed with him. “Well, I was very ill, but much better now.”
Peter reached up and placed his small, grungy hand on Max’s forehead. “You still feel like a fever.”
“Lord Maxwell, I am dreadfully sorry. I didn’t know about the stowaways until a day after leaving London.” Perkins, one of the drivers for the Warrick family stood in the doorway. Five more boys filed past the servant and clamored around Max.
“That is what I was trying to warn you of,” Drake announced. He looked exhausted.
“I thought my father had found me.”